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Flowers (Allergies)

What would you do if you had a bridesmaid who was very allergic to the flowers you picked, would you want her to tell you, or just suck it up and dose herself on pills?

Also I would kiss your feet if you could find me a dress similar to this one

http://www.fashion-era.com/images/2006_7_trends_fall/partydresses/WomensGraemeBlackBrownDressAW06x.jpg

(specifically the sleeves and fuller skirt in black....pleeeassse!)

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Comments

( 39 raised glasses — toast the couple )
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prettynpink1214
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:13 pm (UTC)
As an allergy sufferer, I offer you this advice:

I might tell someone I'll be fine, but I will be totally miserable just to make a friend's day. I tend to get sneezy and teary around flowers that I'm allergic to. So, if you don't want someone sneezing during your ceremony, you might consider another option. If you can't live without the flowers, I'm sure your bridesmaid will understand. But if there are other options, I'd explore those.
myras_girls
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:25 pm (UTC)
As an allergy sufferer, I offer you this advice:

I might tell someone I'll be fine, but I will be totally miserable just to make a friend's day. I tend to get sneezy and teary around flowers that I'm allergic to. So, if you don't want someone sneezing during your ceremony, you might consider another option.


Agreed. Also, some allergy medications can make you extremely drowsy. Imagine your BM barely being able to stay awake and/or sneezing, itching, and coughing during your wedding.
(no subject) - annabelle_blue - Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
surlywench
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:14 pm (UTC)
1. no link to the dress?

2. the allegies: if she's really allergic, she'd better speak up. It's HER health, and so if she feels it's okay to risk the pills on that day, fine, but if not, and she says that she can't be around them, then both she and the bride need to either find another floral option OR the BM in question can step out of the BM role with no resentment from either side.

I *hate*hate*hate* taking allergy meds. they make me very sleepy and irritable and I wouldn't want to spend a good friend's wedding day in that state!!
purpledaffodil
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:17 pm (UTC)
sorry fixed the link...any ideas?
lumpyhead
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:16 pm (UTC)
I would consider alternate options were I you for your flowers.

wint3rhart
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:17 pm (UTC)
I'd want her to tell me, so that I could change the flowers. Allergies can be dangerous things, even if 95% of the time it's just "superficial" irritating symptoms. Not something that I'd be comfortable messing with!
nightsinger
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:18 pm (UTC)
My dad is deathly allergic to marigolds, as an example -- the pollen causes his airways to completely close up, and he has to be rushed to the ER. Obviously, not all allergic reactions are that bad, but... It really depends on the strength of the allergic reaction.

Were I the bridesmaid in question, I'd definitely speak up, regardless... but if it were a particularly bad reaction and I were the bride and I really wanted this person to be a BM, I'd seriously consider picking different flowers, if only for that one person.
jennofavalon
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:25 pm (UTC)
if one of my Bm's was allergic I would offer to make her bouquet from fake flowers. you have to make sure your friends are comfortable.
Let your girls and everyone in your bridal party know you want them to be as comfy as possible on your day:)
chamilyun
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:36 pm (UTC)
i 2nd this suggestion - make her the same bouquet with silks. she'll be happy you were thoughtful of her allergies. i know how 'bad' i get on allergy meds and i don't think that spending the day of a wedding where you're a bridesmaid would be easy for me to do either on allergy meds or just 'dealing'/
(no subject) - prettynpink1214 - Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:46 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - geminigirl - Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jennilee_rose - Jan. 24th, 2008 07:09 am (UTC) - Expand
kgayle
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:29 pm (UTC)
Dress
Love love love that dress!
purpledaffodil
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:30 pm (UTC)
Re: Dress
know where to find one like it?
(Deleted comment)
jetaimemoncheri
Jan. 24th, 2008 01:53 am (UTC)
IAWTC. Friends > flowers.
(no subject) - ihatepavel - Jan. 24th, 2008 05:29 am (UTC) - Expand
clareattack
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:44 pm (UTC)
if she is allergic to ALL flowers & could not deal via medication or sucking it up, i might reconsider the bridesmaid! i know, i know--it sounds harsh. but whatever. honest answer.

but if she is allergic to this one specific flower or flowers, i would totally reconsider and change flowers to something comparable.
swankette
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:47 pm (UTC)
I would pick different flowers, have fake flowers, or have no flowers at all (depending on the severity of the allergy and what the fakes looked like). My friend is more important than a decoration.
wavescrashdown
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:48 pm (UTC)
My friends are OODLES more important than flowers. There's no question, the flowers would be gone. I would hope we're close enough she'd speak up.
dulyoncourt
Jan. 23rd, 2008 10:55 pm (UTC)
I would tell the bride. I am sure she'd go crazy if you start acting all sniffly and all that.
beganwithayes
Jan. 23rd, 2008 11:08 pm (UTC)
she should tell you, but if you care about your friend, don't make her suck it up. i am terribly allergic to pollen, trees, grass...basically everything. when i have an attack, it's not too hard to quell the sneezing, but my eyes get watery and sensitive (um no, ms. makeup lady, please do not put that mascara wand anywhere near my face) and i get puffy, not to mention how shitty you feel on allergy medicine. i've had to call in sick to work because OTC meds can fuck you up so hard.
purpledaffodil
Jan. 24th, 2008 04:35 am (UTC)
tell me? you mean i should tell her, I'm the bridesmaid
(no subject) - beganwithayes - Jan. 24th, 2008 04:56 am (UTC) - Expand
batgirl801
Jan. 23rd, 2008 11:23 pm (UTC)
here's an idea, (keep in mind, I don't really have allergies, so this might not work).

keep the original flowers for most of them, and use silks for the allergic one! Most people can't tell the difference from a distance, and that way you still get to use the flowers you originally love!

good luck!
beganwithayes
Jan. 24th, 2008 12:39 am (UTC)
the only problem with flowers is that most people are allergic to the pollen, which is airborne. whenever there's a vase of flowers in my house, i essentially die any time i walk in that room.
(no subject) - batgirl801 - Jan. 24th, 2008 01:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
heartflood
Jan. 23rd, 2008 11:57 pm (UTC)
LOL, I'm a little shocked that you're even asking that question, to be honest! I agree with everyone else here who says you should reconsider your flower choices. Friends are much more important than flowers.
purpledaffodil
Jan. 24th, 2008 04:34 am (UTC)
well i am not the bride I'm the bridesmaid, so be shocked away

I just dont want to ruin my friends wedding
(no subject) - heartflood - Jan. 24th, 2008 04:43 am (UTC) - Expand
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